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Trailer for tonight’s new series of Top Gear

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We’re looking for an excuse to post this just because there’s so much to like – the astonishing child lookalikes, the silent and moody junior Stig, the haircuts and floral shirts that are uncannily like some clothing disasters we remember from our own 70s childhoods.

And we’re the kind of grumpy folk who think the best view of kids is often of their retreating backs as their parents take them away.

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But mainly we’ll be in front of the telly to see if the unmasking of The Stig really lives up to the hype.

Our super-sekrit mole (OK, someone we follow on Twitter) was at the filming on Wednesday and said that it came as a massive surprise.

Who did they round up? Presumably not a current racing driver, as they would have been busy with grand prix preparations. On the other hand, where should the F1 carnival be on that very day but in Britain?

Could it be Jense or Lewis under the famous white helmet?

One guess we liked was Michael Schumacher. And if they can’t get the planet’s most successful racing driver then perhaps they’ll go to a different extreme. Ranking ‘star in a reasonably-priced car’ Billie Piper, for example.

We just hope to God it isn’t Jason Kay.

Clarkson, with characteristic understatement, has said that, while filming the scenes, “hardened, emotionless camera crews said the hair on the back of their neck prickled.

“As a television moment, it’s up there with Neil Armstrong walking on the corpse of JR Ewing.”

Is he right? You can find out one way or the other by tuning into BBC Two at 8pm.

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